I was Never Taught how to Play with my Toys

Remember when you were nine

Watching Kennan and Kel all the time.

Rocket Power and the Rug Rats.

Adventures that we wish we had.

Those where the good old days.

I remember my mother bought me a G.I Joe Action figure.

This soldier was rough and tough and stood at at-tent.

Actions full of ass kicking back flips

Moves that you didn't think could exist.

My ass kicking G.I. Joe was the shit.

Then I did a move with him

that landed him in a trash can 

that I wasn't about to jump in.

Which only took my mom less than 60 seconds to figure out what happened

I had broken my toy.

This wasn't the first one too.

It's in a boys DNA to tear and break

Destruction and chaos is in our fate.

When I was 16 and it was my first time with my mate

I was rough and tough and stood at at-tent.

Actions full of ass kicking back flips

Moves that you didn't think could exist.

I was in it so fast that I forgot the condom

that was in my back pocket even exist

When those precious 60 seconds were up.

A wave of chaos and destruction hit.

I had come to the realization that I broken another toy.

This beautiful woman that portrayed herself as a Barbie

She didn’t deserve a Ken that couldn’t man up to the responsibilities of being a father.

I misused this poor girls' heart because I had my selfish ways.

So in affect plan B was deployed.

I was back to being a child again.

Realizing what troubles would happen if my mother found out about my actions.

Had me on knees praying to the lord

Please don’t let her find out!

To the poor ovary I apologize that I made this mistake.

Granted in my future I would enjoy my seed to lay with your egg.

Just not today.

I was never taught how to play with my toys.

So the next time I take an adventure.

I'll remember to use protection.

Everything will be all that or I'll be having rug rats knocking at my door.